Six Ways to a Sexier Boyfriend

Thanks for the comments about the Olive Garden post....

So I'm checking my Yahoo news... AP feeds, world news, etc... and I notice this little banner ad at the top of the page. A bloggish article by some dipshit expert on men who offered "Six Ways to a Sexier Boyfriend." Six ways to encourage your guy to get in better shape, smell better, be willing to do more around the house, etc... one was encouraging him to get more sleep... another was to buy a cologne that didn't smell like something he'd bought in the eleventh grade, etc... dipshit responses, dipshit article... the ladies probably eat it up.

I have a much better suggestion.

Tell your boyfriend you'll give him one blowjob for every pound he loses. Tell him you'll give him a blowjob if he tries a new cologne. Tell him you'll give him a blowjob when he finishes putting up the Christmas lights. It's simple. Guys will do anything... scoop the kitty litter... shop for wallpaper at Home Depot (that may be a two-blowjob task there...)

Don't the ladies know how much power they have? Don't they understand the control? Get down on your knees in front of me and I am your slave. Name your task.

Why not tell the truth?