My Wife

My wife just imitated me while I was on the phone. When I hung up with someone she repeated the last few phrases with a kind of salacious twist, as if to imply that I was trying to seduce the woman with whom I'd been speaking. I get tired of that sort of thing; it's a drum she never tires of beating, even though I've never slept with another woman in our 453 years of marriage.

So, she became aware pretty quickly that I didn't find it funny and is now trying to make it up via a series of rather mindless comments designed to force a response from me. It's fine. I've responded. Set her mind at ease; why not? What the hell difference does it make to me? I'm a fucking husband and father, come on over here and trample on me, please. Don't worry a thing about it.